I have always been the sort of girl who has liked her alone time. I could get lost in aloneness like a child can get lost in a large mall in the holiday seasons. Where suddenly minutes and hours are no different because though your mother will be frantic when she finds you, you are not lost, no, you are perfectly cocooned in your quiet thoughts which don't register the fears of a mother. They just nestle you with familiar characters and the promise of adventure.
And so now, as an adult, I find myself often unlost in quiet place with familiar characters. I become engrossed in my aloneness which is both quiet and doesn't seem very alone either. But, that quiet, not the incessant ticker of anxieties, paranoias, and insecurities, that brings me comfort these odd days.
And though it's tempting to get lost in the crowd of thoughts, the characters who are familiar and a little insane, I trust the quiet little place, tucked like a precious child in between grace and faith. And even when I wake up, sweating and terrified of my dark, that is the place I always tucked into again.
1 comment:
I have the same passion for aloneness. I YEARN to be alone most days. I used to think it was weird, but the more I forced myself around people, the more I wanted to be alone. Social=time and place.
The best alone time with my own sassy characters? Autumn walks in the neighborhood, no music, sans Josie. Ah.
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